Thursday, 1 June 2017

A Short Story About How Minging My Car Is

The filthy cesspit that I call 'my car' is very much unlike my husband's car. His is sleek, shiny, new and smells of leather, aftershave and coffee. 

My car is a 6-year old people carrier that smells of sour milk, Haribo and farts. 

The reason for such a difference in the state of our respective automobiles is much to do with the fact that, aside from the many, many other hats we mums wear, I am the designated chauffeur to 3 delightful little children, who happen to love spilling milkshakes, eating Haribo and farting in my car (and also Sainsbury's as it happens). 

Today I made the dreadful error of deciding to 'muck-out' my four-wheeled friend and spent an hour wading (I do not use that expression lightly) through half-chewed sweets (some still wet), dagger-hard McDonalds French fries, naked barbie dolls, pairs of one-legged sunglasses, old receipts, a shoe (????) and lots of misshapen solidified brown clumps, which I can only presume (and pray) are reconstituted chocolate. 

When I had finished and sat back to survey my handiwork the car still looked horrendous (see above).

So here's my handy guide to getting your car looking sparkling inside:-
1. Pay someone else to do it.
2. Don't let your kids get into it. Ever. Again.

Lucy At Home


  1. Yes Yes Yes - my car is also somewhat of a sh*theap. I totally blame the kid :-) xx #blogcrush

  2. Haha glad it's not just me, thanks for commenting!!xx

  3. Hahaha I LOVE your tips! My car is awful too. Every time I clean it out, I vow I'm going to keep it tidy and insist the kids clean up after themselves... and yet within a week, it's as bad as ever! #blogcrush

  4. feel your pain my cars a skip!

  5. Our cars are the same, it was so disgusting the other month my best friend shamed me into getting it valeted which I normally do regularly but just hadn't bothered for months ha! THanks for hosting #BlogCrush

  6. Ha ha. Kids and cars don't mix well. They take advantage of the fact that you can't take your eyes off the road to throw all their trash around.

  7. Haha, my car is absolutely disgusting. It's gross and it smells really bad! It's frustrating because it's a nice car, but since I had kids it's just a skip! Thanks so much for sharing with #Blogstravaganza xx

  8. My Mrs., her car has the same look and feel as the one you describe. Mine would resemble your hubby's. Funny how tiny people can really wreak such havoc on a car! It is very gross, and I will now freely use the wordd, 'minging,' which is totally a new one for me! TY! #blogcrush

  9. I actually did a mini sick in my mouth at the 'wading' bit. Bleurgh!! #BlogCrush x


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